I’m a “fixer”. I always have been and always will be.
What does that mean exactly?
For me, it means that I like to help people. I always feel like it’s my duty to be there when people need guidance, advice, aid, etc. When I see a problem, I want to help fix it. That’s just my personality.
Sometimes it works. Sometimes I’m able to say things that get through to people or guide them in a direction towards happiness. Sometimes I’m able to help alleviate the pain they’re dealing with and reassure them that they deserve freedom from whatever is holding them back. And that’s amazing.
But, sometimes it doesn’t work. Sometimes people don’t want to be helped. Sometimes they don’t see a problem, even when their negativity is hurting the people around them. Sometimes they don’t care.
For us “fixers”, that’s hard to accept. We’ll keep trying and trying, convincing ourselves that one day they’ll see the light. When we genuinely love and care about someone, it’s hard to ever step away.
Sometimes we have to.
I write this post with tears in my eyes. I know how hard it is. To feel like I’m “giving up” on someone is easily one of the scariest, saddest, and most heart-breaking things I’ve ever experienced. But, it’s important to know when enough is enough. We can fight forever but, when people refuse to accept help, there’s nothing we can do. There comes a time when we have to put ourselves first. We can’t allow another person’s toxicity stand in the way of our happiness, no matter how much we love them.
In my life, I’m turning that corner.
I’ll save the gritty details- they don’t matter anyways. The point is this:
Fight for the one’s you love. Fight as hard as you can. But when that fight starts to pull you down-mentally, emotionally, and physically- step away. You’re not failing. You’re just refusing to sink.
“There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh. Forget the bad, and focus on the good. Love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don’t. Life is too short to be anything but happy.”
-Jose N. Harris
This post is vague on purpose. My hope is that each one of you can relate in your own personal way. Hold your loved ones close. Be thankful for the people that fill your life with joy and happiness. Don’t succumb to hate. Don’t let people drag you down. Don’t spread their negativity. Don’t give in to pain.
You deserve bliss. Never, ever forget that.
Here’s to knowing when enough is enough…